Monthly Archives: August 2020

Chapter 9 – xix THE END

!!!!!*****WORKING DRAFT*****!!!!! Petyr’s here this evening, he’s been here all day. Their wedding day. Or was. She made us cancel everything. I kept the flower order, brought them in, the white, the yellow seem so pure. I hope she notices. … Continue reading

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Chapter 9 – xiv-xviii

!!!!!*****WORKING DRAFT*****!!!!! Dear Mike – I began to write – I think a lot about the old days now — those were really good days for me. You helped me so many times when I was down or confused; I … Continue reading

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Chapter 9 – xiii

!!!!!*****WORKING DRAFT*****!!!!! The day after Thanksgiving, Petyr dropped me off for my fourth weekly treatment. For the first time, I met with Dr. Viqueira alone, no mother, friend, or solicitous lover to filter the conversation or deflect my deepest fears. … Continue reading

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Chapter 9 – xii

!!!!!*****WORKING DRAFT*****!!!!! “Sarah?” Steph’s voice sounded hollow on the phone. I’d come home at three, and lain on the couch for several hours, exhausted by a simple afternoon at the doctor’s. “Can I come over? We need to talk.” “Why? … Continue reading

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Chapter 9 – xi

!!!!!*****WORKING DRAFT*****!!!!! Petyr spent August in Vermont with his sons, while I continued to cobble together a career. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, I worked in Wellesley at the state mental health clinic. Tuesday and Thursday mornings, I met with individual … Continue reading

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Chapter 9 – ix

!!!!!*****WORKING DRAFT*****!!!!! On my return, I found a letter from Cincinnati waiting. Starting with cheery news about her new neighbors in their apartment complex, she went on to describe her frustration with George, who insisted on working every day, even … Continue reading

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Chapter 9 viii

!!!!!*****WORKING DRAFT*****!!!!! Petyr’s final seminar, “Illness in the analyst and professional wills” almost put me to sleep. Just barely into my 30’s, I didn’t see foresee any need to worry about this in my work. At dinner, I mentioned the … Continue reading

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Chapter 9 – vii

!!!!!*****WORKING DRAFT*****!!!!! The following Thursday, Petyr led us through “Sexual Boundaries: How feelings of guilt, shame, and anxiety surround erotic feelings and erotic counter-transference.”  “Sexual feelings between analyst and analysand often present pitfalls in the therapeutic process,” he began. “Analysts … Continue reading

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Chapter 9 – vi

!!!!!*****WORKING DRAFT*****!!!!! During December, Petyr Cohen walked us step-by-step through increasingly fraught scenarios of ethical dilemmas which commonly emerge during analysis. We easily dispensed with the risks of treating other family members of a patient, and receiving, or proffering gifts. … Continue reading

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Chapter 9 – v

!!!!!*****WORKING DRAFT*****!!!!! My repeated inquiries at the Boston Psychoanalytic Institute finally bore fruit. I met first with Dr. Jacobson, the executive director of the Institute, soon after my return from San Antonio. “The Board has come around to your view … Continue reading

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